Monday, April 25, 2011



There's sense of comfort in the anonymity... isn't it ? i am feeling this from past few days ... i like it when people don't know me my inner thoughts and feelings ... don't know about the things i go through ... it makes me more comfortable .  and i don't like it when people know me really well .. know all about me ... it difficult ... UGHGHGHghghg ! :(

Lets put it this way ..i have a friend ..who is like a real real good friend .. we hang out  together (with other friends as well ) ..we almost talk everyday at night and at length... we meet over drinks as well ..(with other friends)so you know its like drinks brought us close in terms of knowing each other... i know things about his family which any outsider shouldn't be... although he doesn't know a lot about me but still knows things ... and not from the past 2-3 days i don't feel like talking to him .. i just don't ... i just hate the whole idea....and i don't understand why ? 

The only reason i can find is that i am comfortable under those masks. and honestly most of my miseries come from makes feel lonely ,isolated ,frustrated too at times..i find hard to deal with it ..i feel helplessness , a different kind of helplessness ...helplessness that suffocates .
i don't find a way out . i sometimes feel its killing me ...

will the pain ever fade away ? 


strawberry Princess said...

it's not really good to close thing within your self, you may say you like it that way but not your just saying that just because you are use to it.

no one can get use to the pain, trust me I used to be in your shoes but i did learn to let go, let others know something about me, and it did help me.

it's wont hurt if you try a little bit.

Maya said...

@strawberry princess ::

i think you are right ! i need to learn to let go !
thanks for the advice :)